The fire inspector just left. I think he was the same fireman who did our first inspection while we were planning for Matthew. For some reason, I was significantly more annoyed at this process this time around. He didn't like where I had placed the fire extinguisher. It is in the exact same location as last time. He stopped the inspection and waited until every open outlet at counter level was covered. Thank God I had extra outlet plugs on hand! "Children climb, you know", he said. "You will see". I will see? Excuse me, Mr. Fireman, but I already have a child. A very active one who loves to climb. It is a well known fact that becoming a first time parent via adoption teaches you to hold your tongue. It seems as though condescending comments are just a part of the fiber of practically every step of the adoption journey. The first time around I remember thinking that I may not be a parent, yet, but I am an adult. I do know a thing or two about taking care of a child. Our adoption assessor made me feel as though I should sit in the corner wearing a dunce cap when she responded to an answer I gave in a parenting class. This time around I took the classes online, scoring 100% on every test, by the way. And no condescending comments from the teacher.
That is just one example. I guess I thought that this time around those comments would stop. After all, we are already parents. I know that children climb. I know the ins and outs of bonding with a child who spent the first year of his life in an orphanage. I know why you keep a newly adopted toddler on the bottle longer than you would a biological child or one that was adopted at birth. I know that I will field endless invasive questions about my son and my "different looking" family. And even if these comments didn't stop this time around I think I thought that I would handle it better. After all, these are well meaning people just trying to help us get to our end goal- adding to our family. Turns out, not the case. This time around I am even more annoyed at the assumption that I know nothing about raising a family and or adopting a child.
The good news is we passed our fire inspection. So, if having all my outlets covered and my evacuation route tacked to the wall is what it takes to make me a good mommy, then great. I have arrived!