Mommy Might Have Been Lying About a Few Things...

I know that you are suspicious, my Big Five Year Old. Why else would you sneak back down the stairs after being tucked into your bed, or slyly try to catch a glimpse of the photo I just took of you with my cell phone? You are getting so big, and with that comes the realization that maybe, just maybe, Mommy has been lying about a few things. Well, it's true.

• Yes, that was a piece of chocolate I just put in my mouth. You were right, that was a candy wrapper you heard me opening. No, you can't have any. I am a grown up and if I want to eat a piece of candy for breakfast with my now cold cup of coffee because of all of the running around getting you and your brother ready to face your days, then I will.

• Yes, I did just take a picture of you. You were doing something cute, and I wanted to capture the moment so that I can look back on it the next time I am ready to pull out my hair because you can't find your shoe, stuffed dog, hat, library book.... It is called an insurance policy.

• No, I am not always working when I lock myself in the office. Usually I am but sometimes I just tell you that in order to gain a few minutes of "me" time where you and your brother are not wearing me like a coat.

• Yes, Daddy and I stay up late and watch TV. The party starts the minute your bedroom door is closed. Sometimes I even hold his hand. I know these are two things very close to your heart- watching TV and holding Mommy's hand, but sometimes I do them with Daddy as well.

• Yes, I lie to you about not having any  money in my purse to buy Apple Dippers from McDonald's. But we can't buy apples every day when we have them at home!

• Yes, sweetie, I also occasionally lie to you about the TV, car radio, and  my iPhone being "asleep".

• Yes, the toys at the store are actually for sale. Not every family goes to "visit" them like we sometimes do. Some families, with more walking around money and far better storage, actually buy these toys and bring them home. I suggest you make friends with those families.

There are a few secrets I am not yet ready to give up. Yes, that was Santa I was on the phone with the other day. Yes, your baby stuffed hamster does nibble at your leftover food when you leave for school. And yes, you will spontaneously combust if you wear yesterday's underwear. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it!

old macdonald had a hamburger

Sometimes my boys are just so hilarious, especially when they aren't trying to be funny. This was yesterday's conversation in the car on the way home from daycare:

MZW: "Mommy, what are we eating for lunch?"

ME: "It's dinner, honey. You already had lunch."

MZW: "Mommy, what are we having for dinner?"

ME: "Hamburgers and fruit. Will you eat a hamburger?"

MZW: "I LOVE hamburgers. (this is totally news to me.) Remember that time I ate my first hamburger? It was so delicious!" (so delicious?)

ME: "Where did you eat your first delicious hamburger?"

MZW: "At Old MacDonalds." (mzw has called "McDonald's" "Old MacDonalds since he learned how to speak. and yes, it is very cute.)

ALEX: "e i e i ohhhhhhh......"

MZW: "Alex, we are NOT singing right now! We are talking about Old MacDonalds!"

ALEX: "e i e i ohhhhhh......"

ME: "So, Matthew, where did you say you had that first hamburger?"

MZW: "At Old MacDonalds, Mommy."

ALEX: "e i e i ohhhhhh...."

As you can imagine, this went on for some time. Every time one of us mentioned  "Old MacDonalds" little Alex sang "e i e i ohhhhh" at the top of his little lungs. I spent the rest of the ride home coming up with reasons to say "Old MacDonalds" just so I could hear my little guy sing. Eventually Matthew gave up trying to tell him that it was NOT time to sing and just joined in. By the time we hit our street both of them were "e i e i ohhhing" at the top of their lungs....

Sometimes I am just convinced the neighbors think I am crazy.....

              

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